those things.

I worry.

I worry a lot.

not every.single.day.

(okay maybe I do.)

I like to think I am a pretty relaxed person, most of the time.

but I will throw myself out there and say I worry.

we all do.

but what are the things that keep me up the most?

oh, just those things 

I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL OVER. 

but things that maybe, if I try really hard I can.

-I worry that I will love my kids more than my husband,

 bc he will be able to take care of himself & so I will push him to the back burner. 

-I worry that my parents will leave me too soon.

When is too soon? Well of course any time that I am still here. bc I want them here  for every.single.thing. and there will never not be a milestone that I want to do without them.

-Even worse. One parent leaving me and the other too soon. 

-That my best friends will move across the country (or to another country) 

& those random days together will be less and less.

-That someone will fall out of love with me, bc I am difficult & a perfectionist.

-That I won't have a job one day.

bc I worked for myself for years & my resume will still look similar to when I was 21.

babysitting is credible, no?

-That my kid will be special needs and I will love them,

but the world will be cruel.

-That cancer will win.

-That my friends won't be able to have children.

-When that first person breaks my kid's heart.

so today...today I have my health, my parents, my best friends, love, a job, a place to live, and a lot of other really amazing things.

so today I will not solve the whole world and figure out God's plans.

I will relax and know that bad things are inevitable... but it will be okay!

-Jeremiah 29:11- 

a ratchet night.

ratchet:

"Imagine a woman that wears skinny clothes, bad looking heels & fishnet stalkings, blasts Drake or Waka off her phone, would go out of her way as to cop CD's from these artists, has a bad hairdo, looks immensely disgusting as a human being, and would rather spend her time maintaining her looks, communicating among her folk, and being a jobless, gold-digging bum for the rest of her days, not even bothering to get herself a good shower, a paying career, and a damned effort to earn a diploma."

(urban dictionary) 

_____

so I hate to group myself/my friends in the above category.

but when I tell you we experienced the most ratchet club experience ever, in order to see Drake,

"believe me". 

I have been to clubs, crazy concerts, mosh pits, and I have even been to clubs in Vegas... 

but this, this was an experience all it's own.

just ratchet. 

_____

we all got ready, had dinner, and then headed out to the club

we got a table bc we figured there would be far too many people & we needed a "place" to find each other and stay together...

we got  bottle service with the table & it was complete with a sparkler on the end, which was fun.

the bartender even danced in her gold booty shorts for us...

we were in a side room, so we knew we had to get into the "club" part soon before Drake came in.

...we were PACKED in there!

we got pushed SO bad one time & saw people shoving through the line...

well, it was James Harden coming to the club with his little entourage!

(this is a pic from the club's instagram)

after a good while of just standing so so close to one another, fights breaking out, sweat, other people's weave sticking to your arms, and endless Drake songs...

they finally announced him....

(Blair captured this beauty with her cell phone, we were very close.) 

and as you can see, he was relieved to see us there!

and then confetti fell & people popped more bottles

and a group of guys in front of us decided to drop kick this guy and beat the crap out of him, 

while "sec-urity" stood there nodding their heads to the music.

we decided to leave shortly after this.

what an experience.

____

and as we were leaving, the limo driver looked at me and said

"Nikole, that place you went... it was not  for you and your friends."

yes sir, we figured that out minute one...

but,

WE SAW DRAKE! 

___

summa time

It is summer time!!

It doesn't feel much different really, but anytime that cut off denim shorts and messy hair are more acceptable, is okay with me.

I also seem to have a slight obsession with patios/drinks/snacks & spending time outside.

which is lovely... until you have to put a bathing suit on. ugh.

_____

Friday:

Saturday:

Sunday:

I think 30 min at the pool a day would make me the happiest person ever.

(except when 8+ kids are playing "Marco/Polo"... they scream like they are being attacked and I can't help but worry about them haha)

 I started OITNB this past weekend 

(along with 43878349803421980354 other people)

I made orange/black(chocolate) cupcakes for the celebration... I am 4 episodes in and trying to make it last a little longer than I really want to. Although I am looking forward to the finale!

____

So here starts the summer of a 25 year old

lol

#millhump2014

I am 25.

which means I am in the age group of friends getting married...

and

I LOVE IT! 

let's be real for a second,

wedding season is a lot more fun than graduations, baby showers, and funerals.

and while I do look forward to my friends all having babies, weddings are the very best!

____

a couple of weekends ago we went to ATX for Tess & JR's Wedding.

such a good time. the ceremony was sweet, the reception was long and fun filled, and the after party was on 6th street.

this would be the only picture I got with the bride...

___

Tess & JR,

Thank you for letting me celebrate with y'all!

The ceremony was the sweetest & I don't think there was a dry eye.

and the reception was just a really big, fun dance party!

Lots of love in the room

Wish you all the best!

___

If you want to be a real creeper:

#MILLHUMP2014

random tuesday fun.

Remember those fun fill out things from Myspace?!

the ones that you fill out & nobody really cares?!

yep, I did one & threw in some random pictures, that alone could not fill up a blog.

enjoy. 

______

Cooking: I've been using my cute little grill lately, makes me excited to eat semi-healthy.

Drinking: Water all the dang time.  

Reading: too many books at one time, I need to actually finish one. 

Wanting: my hair to grow. a day by the pool. a week at the beach.

Looking: real rough today. this rain though.

Playing: I'm stuck on this one. I'm not playing... lol 

Wasting: Time doing this, duh! and wasting money at Target... but it isn't really wasting if you LOVE it.  

Wishing: I was naturally tan & that tanning beds did not cause skin cancer.  

(but I do enjoy wine/spray tans) 

Enjoying: work being so lovely.I am really liking my new hires, spring clothes, & being busy.

Waiting: always, and half the time I really don't even know what for exactly. 

Liking: those plastic tumblers with plastic straws for my ice water.  

Wondering: if anyone else finds these dumb quizzes half as interesting as I do!

Loving: summer time. laying on the couch. church. laughing really hard. sleep. 

Hoping: Even though I have made horrible eating choices, that my body decides to just ignore those 8345894398043 calories and not turn them into jiggle fat. 

Marveling: At life. and the strange beauty of imperfection. 

Needing: a week long vacation away from everything, where I have to sit still and not know what time it is. 

Smelling: my scentsy! 

Wearing: a black shirt with dark skinnies. I mean, do I even wear anything else?! 

Following: strangers on instagram, but not letting strangers follow me... makes sense.  

Noticing: girls are crazy. we make up most of the things that make us crazy also. 

Knowing: I feel like I've lived so much, and I am not even a third of the way done. (hopefully!)

Thinking: more like over thinking, anything & everything. 

Feeling: good today.

Bookmarking: my daily journal has a bookmark. thank goodness, I would never find the days without it. 

Opening: books? doors? what do you mean. 

Giggling: all the time. especially when it is uncomfortable. 

Feeling: lazy. I need to start making the most of my mornings before work!

_______

jessica graduates law school.

I have an abnormally smart group of friends.

overachievers to say the least

 I LOVE it.

without knowing it, I think we push each other to do our best.

it has never been a competition, bc we have all chosen very different educational/career/relationship paths,

but what we do is set a standard of our best, not perfection,

and it has been so awesome to see how brilliant my friends are.

(I have other brilliant friends not pictured above lol) 

____

this week I will brag on Jessica, who just graduated law school from St. Mary's. 

she alllllllways had this goal.

we are SO proud of her!

Congrats JESS,

can't wait to have you back home!

fun week.

I promise I worked all these days,
I just sure did find time to have some fun too.

___

Wednesday:

what a beautiful WIN by our Rockets.

sad that whole playoff thing is over.

0.9.

i will never underestimate the power of a second.

___

Thursday:

finally got some crawfish

and got to see my best friend.

life has gotten in the way of my eating crawfish & seeing holly.

glad that changed this week. lol 

___

Friday:

worked with these pretty ladies.

and had a little birthday dinner for my mom

when I tell you the weather was perfect, 

I am not exaggerating.
perfection.

I could have sat there all night.

it was lovely.

(and there were chips and salsa lol)

I had my first

Bahama Buck's snocone that night too.

toasted coconut with cream.

your'e welcome.

___

Saturday & Sunday:

a mix of work, being lazy, and pool time.

 

___

Monday:

my mom & little sister's  Birthdays

I took Bre for a snocone after school

and my mom, my dad, & I had 

wonderful pappasitos last night :)

___

It has been a fun week of summerish things & I love it!